Dig (Notevember 2020, #24)

I had been watching the dog in the hard hat for the better part of twenty minutes before I decided to ask him what was going on.

“Hi there, boy. Whatcha up to?”

“Uh, hi yusself. Woof. Just digging.”

“Any particular reason?”

“Yeah, naw, I jus’ reckon someone oughta do it”, he offered sarcastically.

“Right. What’s with the hard hat, then?”

“Safety, mate. Can’t be running around on a construction site all irresponsible, eh?”

He had a fair point. Still wasn’t making any sense.

“How’d you get the hat?”

“Some tradie tossed it, told me to go get it. Strange way to make a gift, but who am I to judge?”

“You don’t suppose he wanted you to bring it back?”

“Naw, what sort of idiot would do that? Toss his hard hat when he wanted to keep it?” He stopped digging and tilted his head sideways, scrutinizing me. “You’re not one of them prejudiced fellas who think construction workers are intellectually challenged, are ya?”

“What? No! Of course not.”

“Because fuck me, I’ve had enough of those. People coming by, questioning my work like I’m incompetent or something.”

“No, that’s not what I was doing. Honestly, I was just curious.”

“I mean, you wouldn’t go up to an electrician and ask, condescendingly like, why he or she was fiddling with the switchboard for, eh? Woof.”

“Definitely not. Sorry, I didn’t mean to come across as condescending.”

“Not you, mate. But some of these dipsticks that pass by… Honestly, it’s a wonder I haven’t bit their legs off yet.”

I tried to hide my nervousness with a laugh, but I think he suspected something. “Those thickos would probably taste disgusting anyway”, I tried.

“Woof! I’d hardly be doing it to savour the flavour, would I?” the dog growled. I expected him to raise his hackles any second now.

“Well, I, um…” I really needed to smooth this over, and fast. “Do you want some help? I could grab that shovel over there and dig in.”

The dog seemed surprised. “Uh… Yeah, I wouldn’t mind, actually. So long as you let me take the lead. Experience holds the reins, you know?”

I nodded my assent and reached for a shovel leaning against a stack of bricks.

“Hold on!” barked the dog. “Safety first. I’ll go see if I can find you a high-vis vest and a hard hat. In the meantime, you can keep excavating this hole here.” With a front paw, he indicated a small pit next to the one he had been busy with. “I’ll be back in ten”, he said, and sprinted off with not so much as a woof over his shoulder.

~~~

Through the window, I could see a lone man digging a hole in the gravel on the abandoned plot. I watched him for almost five minutes before sauntering down there.

“Good afternoon, mate. You good?”

“Yeah, thanks, miss. All good. Can I help you?”

“Just wondering why you’re digging a hole out here.”

“Well, there was this tradie dog… He’s gone to get me some safety equipment at the moment, but he should be back any minute.”

“A tradie dog. Right…”